Category: class


  • Morgan Freeman introducing Kenny Chesney is perhaps one of the most incongruous things I have ever seen. Also, Morgan Freeman steels his fashion tips from Kanye West.
  • Everybody but Craig Ferguson is horribly unfunny when presenting awards, especially when they are supposed to be funny
  • Three people in the audience knew what Led Zeppelin was.
  • If they play Watchmen at regular speed it will last for about an hour and will be half as “visionary”.
  • The RAP PACK! Get it! If you don’t get it, it’ll be in black and white to give you the full effect. But it’ll just be desaturated instead of optimized to, you know, look good.
  • Although I enjoy MIA’s Paper Planes, “no one on the corner has swagger like us” gets pretty inane when repeated over and over and over again.
  • MIA is an upsidedown lady bug or something.
  • The Grammy people feel the need to offset the awesome created by the likes of Stevie Wonder and Paul McCartney by teaming them up with The Jonas Brothers and Dave Grohl.
  • Not only is Dave Grohl on the same stage as McCartney, he is taking Ringo’s place (who is still alive, by the way).
  • The Grammy people also seem to know that I am only watching for Radiohead.
  • Shiny suits of all colors are, apparently, cool.
  • I automagically tune out all country music.
  • Thom Yorke can’t not dance funny when he sings. He’s almost as bad as John Mayer’s sing-y face. Despite, or perhaps because of, this, Radiohead’s performance was freaking awesome.
  • The Grammy people know I will keep watching for Neil Diamond.
  • SAM JACKSON!
  • I feel like I could enjoy T.I. if he didn’t have that stupid hat on.
  • Obama has more Grammys than Kanye. Or something like that.
  • The words “Yes we can” said by a rich white guy is… kinda funny.
  • Smokey Robinson is still alive.
  • I generally like the songs in the commercials better than those performed in the actual show.
  • Josh Grobin: The Most Boring Man in Music.
  • Neil Diamond is still alive. And still kind of awesome.
  • Why isn’t T.I. performing with The Diamondator? He performed with everybody else.
  • Paul McCartney upstaged Diamond from his seat.
  • Bo Diddly is a great song no matter who plays it. Also, a great dude.
  • Gary Senise is a strange strange man to be on the Grammys.
  • Especially strange to be introducing Lil Wayne.
  • Those girls during the New Orleans thing are gonna have a lot of bad luck.
  • will.i.am and T-Pain. I love people with punctuation in their names. Even more-so when they have awesome hats.
  • Lil Wayne seems to be an amalgamation of a bunch of young and old people. Interesting.
  • This Bob Dylan/will.i.am commercial really ticks me off.
  • More Zooey D., please. Pretty please. Pretty pretty please.
  • Radiohead can’t catch a break. But at least Robert Plant won the big thing.
  • New Theory: if Radiohead wants a Grammy, they need to get old. Quick.
  • You can’t play out Robert Plant. It’s kind of stupid.
  • Woo. More Stevie Wonder. Hopefully he can get away without geting bombarded by Jonases again.
  • Playing commercials over Stevie Wonder seems kind of screwed up. Like playing out Robert Plant.

So, that’s all. Hope you enjoyed. I’ll update this more often now that I’m settled into a routine at school.

This is my final paper for my Modern English Literature class. I got an A- on the paper. I hope you enjoy it.

Opening lines are important. They can be exciting (“It was a pleasure to burn.”) or boring (“Opening lines are important.”) Sometimes the author just wants to set up where the rest of the book will take place and sometimes the author uses the opening line to set up the tone and actions of the rest of the book (“All this happened, more or less.”) A. S. Byatt’s opening line to “The Thing in the Forrest” goes like this: “There were once two little girls who saw, or believed they saw, a thing in the forest.” From this we get our two main characters (the girls) and what happens to them (they see a thing in the forest) but we get the most important piece of information from what is set off in commas: “or believed they saw”. Byatt never clarifies if they actually saw the thing in the forest or if they imagined it or if it was something in between but she does imply that it doesn’t matter if they saw it or not. They believed they saw it and that is all that matters. There is a line from the 1994 classic film The Santa Clause which says, “Seeing isn’t believing. Believing is seeing,” I think that this sentiment is what Byatt is trying to convey, and I agree with her.

There is nothing in any book that matters that says there is a difference between perception and reality. The reality of reality is that reality is relative. We see what we want to see and discard everything else. The NBA might as well not exist since I never watch it. For all I know Alice really traveled down the rabbit hole and Jonas could really receive all of the memories of the past and hold on to them for everybody else. All it takes for one thing to be real is to believe it is so and it only takes a closed mind to deny all of the different realities provide by literature and our imaginations. The thing that separates us from the rest of the animal kingdom isn’t language or prehensile thumbs; it’s the ability to think of things that can never exist. As long as we continue to dream of and write new worlds and scenarios and most importantly believe in these scenarios we will be a prosperous species.

When I was an engineering student I would get dirty looks for reading a work of fiction instead of an instruction manual or blueprint because the fiction didn’t really exist and instruction manuals are useful and real. My fellow students were going to make the world a better place through sheer force. They would perfect everything and make everything easier, faster, stronger, better. They knew they could build the best mousetrap ever because they understand the world and how it works. There would be no need for fiction or stories of the future and the past and the never-going-to-happen because reality would be perfect. I yelled at them about their shortsightedness and arrogance in my head. They were being taught that only what was real mattered to their studies and I became afraid of our future. I overheard and took part in many discussions about how stupid and boring the Freshman English classes were because the world of fiction had no bearing on what was actually happening and that they were wasting precious time they could be spending learning about stress tests and load bearing beams reading stupid stories about things that couldn’t even happen! These are the kids that would get a LEGO set and build a giant box instead of an arctic base or a moon rover. A lack of imagination as a child led to the future of our society being doomed. Luckily I got out of there as fast as possible and retreaded to the happier reality of fiction.

When a good reader reads they learn as much about how the world works as an engineering student learns from a lecture. They learn about how people interact with people and how they deal with situations and how to be a good human being, even though all of the events and people and reactions are made up by the author. They can take the make-believe and believe it can be made. The unwavering belief that anything is possible as long as the believer keeps on believing is the most important aspect of life. If we can perceive anything as reality we can change reality to whatever we want. If we apply this concept to everybody on the planet and everybody that will ever be on the planet we can truly perfect the human race. We can create the best of all possible worlds through imagination and belief. We can use fiction to change reality for the better and we can use reality to create even more fantastical fiction. We can spread all ideas everywhere and give everybody the option to think about how they think things should be and we can change things.

Alright, enough of this changing the world business. That can’t really happen anyways. It’s just a pie-in-the-sky idea, taken from an idealist’s brain and translated into lofty ideas about reality and fiction. Everybody knows that only the real things matter. How much money do I really have in the bank, how much does an education really mean, how much does this essay really matter. None of it is going to change much of anything. We shouldn’t get our hopes up for a better future. In all likelihood the world will be just about the same when I die as it was when I was born. Sure, the technologies will change and there’ll be more people in the world but none of it will make much of a difference. I certainly can’t change much for myself, much less anybody else. I might as well go read an instruction book and learn how to make things work better than they do now. It’s not like a believing something can be better will actually make the thing better. Unless. Unless everybody believes in the power of belief. If everybody fully understood the power of belief and the effect it has on reality they would truly become wholly realized as human beings. We would appreciate every possible reality presented in fiction and non-fiction as being possible and we would be better for it. Even our engineers, misguided though they may be right now, could become better at what they do if they dared to dream about things that nobody dreamt of before. If they just got past the idea of “impossible” they would realize that impossible doesn’t exist. They would recognize that the only the impossible is impossible, everything else will work if you believe you can find a way to make it so.

It’s another Friday (Thursday) writing. Here you go. It’s not really fiction so I’m just gonna post it below:

Is there such a thing as being too cool for your own good? It’s a question that has been on my mind as we return to class. I see you, walking in with your hat with the sticker still on and your shirt and your clothes. Some say the clothes make the man but I say the man makes the clothes. Or at least sweatshop workers make the clothes for the man. That’s probably the closest to reality. Anyways, your hat with the stupid sticker. What does the sticker do? Does it signify how much you spent to look stupid? Does it show that you don’t have the motor skills to peel off a sticker? If that’s the case, doesn’t it also show that you shouldn’t be allowed in college?

There comes a time when we must all consider our place in life. You may think that comparing yourself to others is the worst way to do this, but I would say that, compared to you, I am a genius. If I had to place myself on the cool scale, I would put myself somewhere between the guy who wears girl jeans and the guy who wears the huge white tee-shirts. Funnily, I have seen both ends of the spectrum keep the sticker on their hats. Must have been a problem with schooling then. They were never taught how to hold on to stickers without having them stick to their fingers. Now they have stickophobia, a word I did not make up. Prove me wrong.

As previously established, there are two ends to the cool spectrum, neither of which is actually cool. The girl jeans guys (to be called from now to eternity Hipsters) and the big white shirt guys (to be called from now to eternity Guys With Big White Shirts On) are so opposite of each other that they are practically the same. You can see this phenomenon demonstrated in anything where there are two distinct sides of the same coin. The real question is whether the Democrats are Hipsters or Guys With Big White Shirts On.

The Man

I’m back at school and that means back at writing. So here is my first Friday (or Thursday, I guess) post. I need to write one page on anything for one class every Friday. This one is a true-ish story. True in that it happened, -ish in that it happened in a slightly altered state.

I shouldn’t be afraid of this new school. All the same people are going to be there. Including him.

The Man